HEY TREES! SCREW YOU

"HammerheadFistpunch" (hammerheadfistpunch) 03/18/2015 at 16:59 • Filed to: None

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Sincerely,

Australia

MonkeePuzzle > HammerheadFistpunch 03/18/2015 at 17:28

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neat and all, but that seems pretty unnecessary

HammerheadFistpunch > MonkeePuzzle 03/18/2015 at 17:30

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its short cuts from their expedition to find that crashed bomber at the end of the video. This is for their sponsor EFS.

WiscoProud > HammerheadFistpunch 03/18/2015 at 17:53

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Are these trees balsa? They seem to be a few inches thick, and he simply does not give a fuck about running them over.

SWITAWI > HammerheadFistpunch 03/19/2015 at 11:20

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Overland, over trees, it's all the same really. (lol)

A long, long time ago, in a county far, far away my friends and I had a spot in the middle of a brushy field where we would go hang out to smoke and drink. Looked a lot like that video above. I won't say how old we were at that time because the fact that we were hiding out should make it pretty evident.

There was a hard to see dirt two-track that led off the nearest road to 'The Spot', but after a few beers sometimes some of the guys would go driving off through the brush, over small trees and the like, just goofing off. One night we were hanging out and a friend drove in to tell us he passed were two Sheriff's Deputies sitting in the dark off the road, obviously waiting for us to come out. We got nervous but then got a little brave because at that time the only law enforcement trucks in our county were the local Game Warden and the Highway Patrol Weights & Measures officer. Even the city and county K-9 units drove Crown Vics.

With the unerring assurance folly of our youth we figured to wait them out. They couldn't get to us over that rough track, right? You can see this coming, can't you?..

After a while reality set in and everyone starts to fret about getting home before we get in 'bigger' trouble. Remember the days when kids feared their parents more than the law? Yeah, those were the days, lol.

So everyone's getting in their vehicles, about to break cover, figuring we'll let the few non-drinkers take extra passengers and drive out the regular way while the rest try sneak out another way or follow after a delay if the officers take offered 'sober bait'. And then a small star's worth of bright and colored lights lit up our world as a Crown Vic came through the scrub right at us. Ho-Lee SHIT, everybody stomped their gas pedals and scattered in different directions like motorized cockroaches.

My '81 Subaru Wagon (Brown/5-Speed, I kid you not) couldn't plow the brush so I was bobbing and weaving when a pickup caught up to me and proceeded to follow right behind, with his high beams on. The trees he was knocking over were banging the rear of my wagon because I couldn't go as fast around them as he could go through them. For a minute it was almost like that truck behind me was trying to devour my car and I couldn't get away from it because he was dogging my bumper at every turn. The panic of almost getting busted was suddenly compounded by the panic of having my own scene from Duel or Maximum Overdrive and I was yelling and cursing and covered in the sloshing, spilled remains of my last beverage when I suddenly broke through into a clear plowed field. I hooked the wheel and took off down the farmer's track around the field. We finally reached a paved road and I jumped out to scream at my friend to turn off his m@&^&er-f#*@ing headlights because he was announcing our location to the entire world.

As I made it to his driver's door I was greeted by three completely panic-stricken faces, him and two girls. I asked if everyone was okay and, at the same exact moment he said "I think you just saved our asses" and one of the girls said " F#@k. Those. TREEEEEES ! "

As I was watching that video above all I could hear was that girl's voice, lol.